Wednesday, July 1, 2020

Dancing at the Pity Party

Amazon.com: Dancing at the Pity Party eBook: Feder, Tyler: Kindle ...
Dancing at the Pity Party
Tyler Feder
Dial, 2020 201 pages
Grades 8-Up
Graphic Memoir

Feder traces her experience of her mother dying from cancer when she was a sophomore in college. We learn about the person Mom was, Tyler's relationship to her and the entire dynamic of the family. The book begins with some general background and then explores the summer of the diagnosis through Mom's death, the funeral process, jumping back into life and afterward. The effect of both Mom’s life and death on the author are explored and we see her path to healing. The back of the volume includes actual family photos, giving the reader further perspective and reinforcing the truth behind the story.

 

Graphic novels are a great vehicle to convey complex human emotions, such as mourning. Feder is able to use images to illustrate the varied emotions she was feeling during the loss of her mother at such a vulnerable time. This is an honest and sad story, yet there is humor and irony and beauty and love amidst the grief.  There were times I laughed, times I cried, but I never wanted to put the book down even though the subject matter is sad. Through the story we see the importance of the overall family and care and support they offer each other. Readers unfamiliar with Jewish burial traditions will experience, perhaps, a different way of processing this terrible time with the healing power of family and community at the funeral and Shiva. The full-color illustrations, mostly created in a pastel pallet utilizing a lot of pinks and greens, are reflexive of the author/illustrator’s youth and memories and place the reader in her past. Clearly, this was a devastating tragedy in the life of the author, but eventually she comes out of the other side keeping some of her mother with her and becoming a strong woman thanks in part to her journey with Mom. A love letter to her mother, Feder invites readers into her life and allows us to see both its beauty and pain. Those who have experienced such a loss will find comfort amidst the pages of this book, yet others will also relate with the author as they travel the journey with her. Perfect for teenage graduates of Raina Telgemeier who love graphic memoirs but are ready for something a bit more mature.

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